Being Human? Human Being ?

30 March 2002

I had experienced the pain...
I had been there...
Seeing all those thing...
feeling it crawling underneath my skin...
The terrible scents of death...

And I had been thinking
What if ?
What if i'm given another chances?
Second chances to fix everything?

So, I work hard...
Trying, and struggling..
Waiting for the second chances...

4 August 2013

It happen again...
Experiencing the same thing all over again..
This is my second chances, to fix everything..
But still I do nothing..

Maybe i did not work hard enough..
Maybe i did not try..
Or maybe i'm just plain weak..

Seeing them die... Both the people i love..
Both the people i care about...
Both in the same way..

It frustrating, isn't it?
Knowing but still can do nothing?

Maybe this second chances..
Is my second chances to fail..
And my second chances to grieve..

Or it is simply a friendly reminder..
That we are just human..
And that is what we are..

New Girl to The City

LIFE VS LIVE

Sejak dua menjak ini, ku mencari fungsi kewujudan
Dalam persekitaran yang penuh kejumudan
Terperangkap dalam jasad, ku keliru
Mujur ada kau si peneutralisasi pilu

Namun aku tetap murung, berkurung
Tubuh makin susut, menunggu tarikh luput
Komplikasi di halaman rusuk kiri
Makin sukar nak bernafas, nak bergerak, nak berdiri

Sumber : http://www.liriklagumuzika.com/2012/06/lirik-lagu-teman-pengganti-black-ft.html#ixzz2Vdy3I1Md

Fuck fuck fuck

HorroR

Aku suka tgk cerita dekat tv...
cerita boleh mghiburkan hati, boleh menghilangkan kebosanan, boleh juga mengajar benda baru...

Tapi lately banyak cerita2 merepek dengan makhluk2 pelik yg menyeramkan...
Seram giler bila tgk cerita2 mcm tu....

Tapi I didn't realised, ada yg lebih menyeramkan dalam hidup ni...
Apa yg lebih menyeramkan adalah AKU!!

Aku semakin menyeramkan, membencikan dan memeluatkan...
I'm so sick n tired of being me... I hate enduring all this and going on with my life...
But I still going on , sacrificing the thing that I love sooo much...

I feel empty and depress, I feel alone and abandoned....
But the thing is I'm empty.. heartless, painless, and feelingless...
and that is scary...

It coming again, hunting me... I;m afraid that i'm no longer strong,
No longer have the energy to fight..
I'm afraid of falling again into it hand.....

All 5 years of suffering and traumatised,
And how hard i work to get out of it...

Now, I'm all alone,
fighting again my worse enemy,
Abandoning people i love,
For the reason that i dont know,
For the sake of serenity and peace,
that i never find....

Living a wasted life...
My life is scariest of all movies i ever watch...
A complete Horror!!

And I still have nobody to turn to..
or to talk to...
how stupid.... how this bullshit...
Is a life of mine...

Pictures

This is the clock upon the wall
This is the story of us all

Pictures of you, pictures of me
Hung upon your wall for the world to see
Pictures of you, pictures of me
Remind us all of what we used to be

Confess to me, every secret moment
Every stolen promise you believed
Confess to me, all that lies between us
All that lies between you and me

We are the boxers in the ring
We are the bells that never sing
There is a title we can't win no matter
How hard we might swing

Pictures of you, pictures of me
Hung upon your wall for the world to see
Pictures of you, pictures of me
Remind us all of what we could have been

To : The Happy You

In the time of difficulty is when I will remember, 
the You and the Me that so happy together,
When we live a life without worry,
When we have nothing to feel sorry...                                                 

From : The Saddening Me

Broken Vow

"I'll let you go
I'll let you fly
Why do I keep on asking why
I'll let you go
Now that I found
A way to keep somehow
More than a broken vow"

After 15 years, fate has brought us back together,
It is funny how i remember,
I was young but surely i'm not sober...

Just now, when we met again,
I feel like dying of embarrassment,
I try to denied all that had happen...

But it take a very short time,
For me to make up my mind,
And accept all that had been done...

Now, I understand,
Why all this had happen,
and surely all that happen for a reason... 

I'm WeaK

Another day in this broke down place 
The towers grow and the skies are slowly replaced 
With the cold gray structures that lay to waste 

You make me sick and I hate what I feel inside 
As I lobby for acceptance, you know I've tried 
Another life for you to nullify 

I'm weak inside because I see the shape of things to come 
I'm weak inside because I don't change what's begun 
I'm weak inside because I hate what I've become 

I'm feeling empty as I struggle with my thoughts each day 
Just a drone who contributes to his own decay 
An apathist who's sweat and blood grease the wheels for pay 

Why am I afraid to stand up and knock them down 
When I've been betrayed 
You've been conditioned to accept everything they say 

So I walk on but I start to stumble 
Through the ruins of a life that's troubled 
By the expectations I'm conditioned to struggle 

The streets are crowded and I feel so all alone 
Stacking bricks that to this day remain unthrown 
Yet I'm the one to cast the first stone